feLfeLa's blog

Friday, November 17, 2006

You know you are an Egyptian when....

( I know this one has been around for many years, but I consider it a classic )

(1) You call any older person you've never met before
: uncle "Ammo" or "Khalu".


(2) Getting a visa to Europe or the States is like
getting a baby, everybody tells you "mabrook"


(3) You always carry excess luggage when you travel and learn how
to beg the personnel at the airport to allow the excess baggage
you've got as soon as your father stops doing that for you.


(4) Your dream is holding a different passport.


(5) When you FLY BACK home you find 20 people waiting
for you at the airport.


(6) Every time you fly back home you meet relatives you never knew
existed,
and they look nothing like your family.


(7) You look for universities as far away from home as possible.


(8) You always curse at Egyptians when you are back home, but when you
live abroad you make many Egyptian friends, and say how wonderful
are the ones back home.


(9) Your aunt is always asking when she can dance at your wedding


(10) Everyone is a family friend.


(11) People are never happy with what you've achieved.
If you graduated from school they'll tell you "Oqbal el Shahadeh
el kebeerah", and when u get that "Oqbal el Aroosa or Areees",
and when you get that "Oqbal ma nefrah be Aoulad-kum", and when
you get that "Oqbal ma tefrahu bi! ! shahadit-hum", etc...


(12) You only walk on the streets in groups of seven or more people
and
talk really loud in Arabic all together.


(13) You fight over who pays the dinner bill.


(14) You teach Westerners to swear words in your language.


(15) When you go on a date you start thinking of lousy places where
nobody would go to, so you won't bump into family or friends.


(16) You end up in a lousy place and still bump into the relative with
the biggest mouth.


(17) If you are 25 and not married yet, your parents make you feel
that
you are getting too old.


(18) Getting married becomes the only way you can escape your parents,
unless you are part of the lower eighty percent of the population;
then you live
with them, even after marriage and go out with your wife on a date.


(19) You keep on saying Kol Sanna Wa Inta Tayeb left,
right and center !


(20) You always say "Open the light" instead of "Turn on the light "
or"
get down from the car" instead of "get out of the car."


(21) You pronounce your p's as b's (bebsi and bolice) unless you were
raised also speaking a western language, a rare breed in present
Egypt


(22) You ask your dad a simple question and he tells you a story of
how he had to walk miles just to get to school.


(23) Your parents were ranked first in school.


(24) Your dad swears at you with words that affect himself (Ya
Ibnil....)

PS: Amannah Alikoom ... DO NOT fwd to non-Egyptians, balash fadayeh
and then, they will not laugh; unless you want them to donate some
money for the sad state of Egyptian youth.

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